Complications Minor Chapter 18 (of 20)
Oct. 31st, 2008 01:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
misssara11Title: Complications Minor
A Blackpool/Secret Diary of a Call Girl crossover with just a hint of Keen Eddie
Rating: M
Paring: Peter Carlisle/Hannah Baxter
Spoilers: All of Blackpool and S1 of Secret Diary of a Call Girl
Summary: It's a simple arrangement. Right?
Chapter Summary: Hannah's not jealous. Dinner is had. Time is spent apart for various reasons. Hannah makes a surprising discovery.
Previous chapters can be found here.
AN:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
swankkat and kalleah made this whole thing better. To see what Hannah wore before, well, you'll see click here.
Jealous girlfriend was something Hannah would have never used to describe herself but she found it came quite easily. It wasn’t that another woman was talking with Peter or even that she was flirting. That happened often enough and it didn’t bother her. But there was something about the way this woman acted. A bit too over-familiar with him. And then Hannah discovered who she was and the feeling was even worse.
As she exited the shop, Peter didn’t turn to her until she was almost next to him. “Ah, there you are! Hannah, this is Natalie Holden. Natalie, this…this is my Hannah.” He dropped the bags and casually placed an arm on her shoulder.
Hannah bristled at the name but shook hands with a polite nod and “How do you do?” and then wrapped her free arm around Peter’s waist, staking her claim. She tuned out the conversation, putting all her efforts into being possessive instead.
Natalie dug in her handbag and pulled out a card. “Well, Peter, it was great seeing you. Here’s the number where I’m staying. Call me and we’ll have that dinner. Nice to meet you, Hannah.”
“No, the pleasure was all mine.” She used every bit of her professional charm and was proud of her restraint when Peter’s cheek was air kissed. After there was some distance between them, Hannah turned to Peter. “So, that’s Natalie.”
Peter took her hand. “Yeah. She’s in town on business. Apparently she’s quite an entrepreneur now. Just sort of ran into her.”
“She’s…attractive. If you like that sort of thing.”
“Don’t be jealous.”
“I’m not.”
Peter stopped and turned to her. “Hannah, you don’t have anything to worry about. She’s my past. I got over her a long time ago. You are who I want now. No one else.”
Hannah looked at her feet as she shuffled them. “Then what’s this dinner thing about?”
“Catching up. I didn’t give her specifics because I needed to know when you were free. I’m not going without you. We’re a package deal now.”
She looked up at him with a small smile. “Yeah?”
“Of course. Now, let’s get you home where you can show off all those little things you bought. I’m interested in doing some quality control.”
She grinned as he hailed a cab, feeling better about the situation. She felt even better than that when, after getting through modelling half her new purchases, Peter pounced on her declaring his admiration for the ties that kept the new bra on and the ruffles around the knickers. She’d practically forgotten what was bothering her later on when she was lying satiated in Peter’s arms with him mumbling romantic nothings in her ear.
After multiple reassurances, vocal and otherwise, from Peter, Hannah agreed to the dinner and the time and date was set.
Hannah had a check-up at the doctor’s so Peter was to meet her outside and they would head to the restaurant together. She had just finished up and was heading to the lobby when her mobile went.
“I am so sorry,” he said in lieu of a hello.
“Peter, no. You are not doing this to me.”
“I’ll be there. I promise. It’s just the crime scene I’m coming from caused traffic to back up and I’m sat in a cab quickly going nowhere. Can I please meet you there? I would owe you.”
She huffed a bit. “You’ll be there as soon as you can?”
“Yes. The driver’s inching to a side street as we speak. Thank you, Hannah. I love you.”
“Me too.” She was not happy when she snapped her phone shut. She hailed a taxi of her own and hoped Peter wouldn’t be too long.
Natalie was already waiting when she arrived. “Peter’s stuck in traffic. Do you want to wait or get a table now?”
“Table’s good.” Natalie stood and they approached the hostess.
They slid into their appointed booth and ordered drinks. Hannah found the décor much more interesting than she normally would have. The server took their drink orders and returned with them quickly.
Natalie took a sip of her wine and then said, “So, Hannah, Peter talked about you but didn’t really say anything. He said you were a secretary of some sort?”
“Night time legal secretary, yeah.” She was surprised that Peter kept up that pretence but also didn’t expect him to say what she really did. “We met through my work and knew each other for a few months before we started dating in August. We’ve been serious since the end of November.” She wanted to make it very clear where things stood.
“What made you decide to make the change to dating, if you don’t mind my asking?”
She did but was trying to play nice. “He helped me out of a difficult situation and then, well, he asked me out and I couldn’t think of a why it would be a bad idea.”
“And it’s going well.”
“Very.” Hannah took a drink and thought to herself, ‘So don’t even think of trying anything.’
Natalie studied her for a moment. “Hannah, can I tell you something I think to need to hear?”
She gave Natalie her brightest professional smile. “By all means.”
“No one will ever love you as passionately and completely as Peter Carlisle will. It will consume you both and it can be very destructive if handled wrong. He deserves someone who feels the same way about him. He’s much more fragile than he likes to pretend he is.”
“Is that why you left him?” She couldn’t keep the bitterness from her voice any longer.
Natalie laughed to herself. “No. I was looking for an out from my situation for a long time. I just didn’t know it. Peter was just convenient. I needed some things that were just mine and while I with him, I realised there were many things I never had, including a care-free affair with a charming man that was never meant to last. I’m sorry I hurt him but I think we both ended up where we were meant to. I think we’re both happier now than we ever were together. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment but hindsight and all that. I now I’m in a much better place than I was then and he seems to be as well.”
“I’d like to think I’m a part of that,” Hannah said softly, mostly to herself. She could feel the ice melting in her veins.
“I think you are a big part of that. I mean it. I would ask him about himself and he wouldn’t stop talking about you.” They shared a genuine smile and an understanding.
“I do hope I’m interrupting. Sorry for being late.” Peter had arrived. He slid next to Hannah and kissed her cheek.
“It’s fine. We were just getting to know each other better. Girl talk.” Hannah patted Peter’s leg. He held her hand there before she could pull it back.
The rest of the evening went well. Conversation was no longer strained. While she and Natalie would never be friends, Hannah no longer felt the need to make snide comments under her breath. Any future contact between the two would be an easy acquaintance.
After parting company, Hannah invited Peter back to hers. He accepted and once there, set about doing their nightly routines.
Peter was in his jimjams and under the covers when Hannah entered in a little mint green babydoll with lavender trim and matching panties. He looked up from the book he was reading.
“That’s…new.”
“Yep.” Hannah crawled on the edge of the bed and up between his legs, stopping just out of his reach.
“And lovely.” He took off his glasses and set them and the book off to the side.
“Thought you’d like it.” Peter sat up enough to take her hands in his and gently pulled her closer. He raised an arm and licked the crook of her elbow. Hannah mewed in appreciation. He moved them both so Hannah was propped up on the headboard and he was between her legs. He gave her a cheeky smile.
“However, it’s much too nice to get spoilt. I think at least the knickers need to go.” She lifted her hips to aid in Peter’s decided task. As he came back up, he put her ankles on his shoulders and dipped his head. She let out a cross between a gasp and a moan as she felt his tongue take a broad swipe across her.
She raked her hands through his unruly hair as he did magical things to her with his mouth. She was happy to be in the aftermath when Peter climbed off the bed. He returned moments later, naked and ready to continue what had been started. With her body still humming, he slid into her. It didn’t take long for them both to come, her for the second time. As he nuzzled her neck, Hannah thought back to what Natalie said. She lifted his head so that he was looking at her.
“I do love you so much. You know that right?”
He leaned his cheek against her hand, the ever present stubble scratching her palm and smiled. “Yeah, I know but it’s always good to hear. And I love you, Hannah.” He leaned into her ear. “Completely.” He rolled them so they were facing each other and pulled her to him. And that was how they woke the next morning.
After a bout of fumbling morning sex, Hannah made breakfast as Peter got ready for work. He declared it wouldn’t matter what she served him as long she did it in her short, silky dressing gown. He then pulled her into his lap.
“We’re playful this morning,” she said as she settled in. He just waggled his eyebrows as he sucked on a nipple through the robe. “You’re going to be late,” she meekly protested and then held his head to her.
“Mmph,” he mumbled in response.
“Sod it.” Hannah stood and brought Peter up with her. They made it as far as the three steps to the daybed.
She called a taxi for him as he pulled himself together so he wouldn’t be even later than he was by waiting for the trains.
The next few days the relationship consisted of phone calls and quick meals. Neither schedule allowed for any more than that. After an afternoon and evening of out-calls, Hannah missed Peter and went to his flat instead of her own.
She was disappointed but not surprised to find it empty. She called him to say she was there and got his voice mail. He rang back while she was in the shower and told her to make herself at home if she hadn’t already. She could hear the commotion in the background wherever he was and that he was called away by a female voice.
After slipping into her usual nightwear when she was at his and a pair of her own pyjama shorts, she helped herself to a selection of takeaway boxes she found in the refrigerator. After a couple of flips through the channels, she decided it read in bed, hoping to stay up until Peter came home.
She woke with a start was the book was being pulled from her hands.
“Hey beautiful.” Peter leaned down and kissed her forehead. Hannah gave him a sleepy smile and let her eyes drift shut. The next thing she was aware of was being pulled into Peter’s arms. She wriggled against him with a contented sigh as they both fell asleep.
Hannah woke up to the smell of coffee, a gentle shake of her shoulder and someone calling her name. A few bleary winks revealed Peter offering her a steaming mug. She sat up and took it from him while he pushed a plate of toast in her direction.
“You know, Detective, there are better ways of getting me up in the morning.”
He finished his sip and smiled. “I’m aware and would love to indulge us both I don’t have the time. This case is too important and at a critical point. If I can get away, and I’m not promising I can, are you available for a quick lunch?”
“I think so.” She took a bite of toast. “I miss you. Here I am, a fiercely independent woman who says she doesn’t need anyone but herself and all I want is to be with you. We’ve not even really been separated.”
“I miss you too, Hannah.” He leaned in and kissed her. “I’ll call you about later, either way.” With that he was soon out the door. She had just set the dishes in the sink when she heard the door slam open. Peter strode back in and announced, “Forgot something.” He pulled her to him and kissed her hard. She responded in kind and he let her go. “I love you.”
She grinned at him. “I love you, too. Now go.”
He smiled at her over his shoulder as he closed the door behind him. Hannah couldn’t stop smiling as she got dressed and in a fit of domesticity, made the bed.
She and Ben met for a jog, both happy the weather was taking a turn towards spring. Peter called to say he couldn’t make lunch but hoped she could meet him later at his where he would make dinner for her and give his undivided attention for the rest of the night. She happily accepted.
She had three appointments after that. The first was usual business. The second finished very early and was so mortified that he couldn’t continue. The third rescheduled on her. This left her with unexpected free time and she decided to head to Peter’s a couple hours early. She loved watching him cook. His Jamie Oliver was coming along nicely.
She opened the door to the bedroom and went to strip down for her shower. She had removed her jacket and had a hand on her blouse buttons when it hit her. She didn’t close the door to the bedroom when she left. She turned and saw the bed she knew she had made was now in chaos. She took a deep breath to calm herself. The scent was overwhelmingly familiar. The room smelled of fading sex.
Hannah stumbled across to the bathroom and wretched into the toilet. She stood up, rinsed her mouth and calmly moved to the sofa to wait.
It made sense really when she thought about it. The signs were there. She should know. They had spent very little time together as of late. He was always claiming to be busy. And it when she thought about it, it seemed to her that he made very little effort to see her and that he barely touched her when he did. His job really was the perfect cover. No one would think twice about it. She wouldn’t have had it not been for what she’d just seen.
And that was the thing.
She didn’t have a problem believing a boyfriend would cheat on her. It had happened before, though she usually was the one to stray. She just never thought Peter would be the one to.
The door opened twenty minutes later. She watched as Peter walked into the room, sorting through the stack of mail he was carrying. He set it down and shucked off his coat. He jumped when he saw her.
“Hannah! I didn’t realise you were here already. You were so quiet.” He leaned into kiss her cheek. She let him but didn’t attempt to reciprocate. “You all right, love?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? What reason could there possibly be for me to not be all right?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking. Hannah, you’re beginning to worry me.” He went to touch her arm. She evaded him by standing and moving down the hall. She stopped at the door to the bedroom and crossed her arms. Peter followed, confused. “What? It’s the bedroom. Where the bed lives, hence the name of the room.”
“And…” She had to admit, he played dumb well.
“What of it?”
“Damn it, Peter! Before I left this morning, I made the bed!”
“And you messed it up when you got here in a clear fit of insanity?”
“No, you bastard.”
“What?”
She saw it hit him. ‘Clever man,’ she thought to herself ruefully.
“Oh, you couldn’t possibly think…”
“How could I not? The evidence is pretty damning. The room still smells like it.” She pushed away from the wall. “I shouldn’t be surprised. But more than anything, I’m disappointed.”
“I didn’t do anything! And even if I did…”
“What? It wouldn’t matter because I sleep with other men for money? You didn’t seem to have a problem with it when it was you.”
Peter ran a hand through his hair and pointed at her. “I have never judged you on your career choice. But since you brought it up, don’t you know it kills me when you step out that door? Makes me sick to know someone else touches you the way I wish only I got to?”
“You said it turned you on. Another lie?”
“It does when I put myself in their place. Let me tell you, my fantasy life is much richer than it was before I met you. And that was long before I truly had you, Hannah.” He started pacing. “I love you so much that I can’t see straight. So I try to be the bigger person. The supportive boyfriend. But you make awfully damn hard sometimes.
“Do you know I live in constant fear? I like Ben but the fact you two are still friends scares the hell out me. What if you decide he really is what you’ve always wanted and that’s why you’ve never cut ties? Or what if one of your clients sweeps you off your feet? Gives you something I can’t? It’s how we met so it’s not out of the realm of possibilities. And I know they may be older or younger that I am. Or better looking. Or more stable. Less angry. Better lovers. They sure as hell are richer. I know the lifestyle you’re accustomed to and I know I can’t give you all of that. And that eats at me constantly. The fact that you take us to the posh places. That you buy me expensive clothes and presents and you think nothing of it. I want to be the man that can do that for you but I know I can’t.”
She could see the tears threatening to fall down his face and felt her own starting to well up. “Then why don’t you say something?”
He looked at her in earnest. “Because it seems to make you happy. And I would do anything to make you happy. I thought I made that clear.”
If the proof wasn’t so clear, she would have forgiven him anything then. She couldn’t look at him when she asked, “Then why did you do it? Do you still have that strong of feelings for Natalie? I’m guessing that’s who it was. Or did you finally give into Shareece?” She was making herself angry again on purpose.
“Hannah, I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING! I have no idea what’s going on here but the fact that you think I could... You don’t know me as well as I thought and I sure as hell don’t know you at all.”
Hannah hugged herself. “I wish I could believe you.”
His voice softened. “Then do.” He went to touch her but it was too much. She knew he lied convincingly enough to Natalie back in Blackpool. Maybe he hadn’t changed as much as he claimed. She grabbed her coat and bag, refusing to meet his eyes.
“I can’t,” she whispered. She paused at the door, finally looking at him. “And for the record, you do know me and you always had me.”
She’d never forget his look of despair as she left.
She flinched as she heard him kick the door as she made her way to the stairs. She really did want to believe him but she just couldn’t.
Hannah hailed a cab once she made it to the street and gave an address. When she reached her destination, she hesitated before knocking.
Ben opened his door and grinned. “Hello!”
She burst into tears and wrapped herself around him. He hugged back. “Hey now, what’s wrong?” She looked up at him and took a breath to answer and ended up sobbing harder. He ushered her to his sofa and held her until she calmed. “Now, you gonna tell me what’s going on?”
“He cheated on me.” She nestled closer.
“Who did?”
“Peter.”
“Pull the other one.” He sat back and gave her an incredulous look. “Peter Carlisle. Your boyfriend. Tall. Skinny. Pale. Always looks like he could use a shave, haircut and a tailor. The one that worships the ground you walk on. That Peter?”
“Yeah.”
“You’re sure?”
“Pretty much.” She gave him a quick run-down of what happened.
“That’s very convincing. Do you really believe it though?”
“I don’t want to be but what other explanation is there?”
“No idea, Han.” He pulled her close again. “Do you want me to kick his arse?”
She laughed. “Not yet. Just be a shoulder to lean on for now.”
“Gladly.”
She let Ben take her for a light dinner and escort her back to her flat. She convinced him to stay and watch some movies. Mostly she wanted the company.
They were into the second one when there was a knock at the door. She knew it was Peter. “Ignore it.” Ben nodded.
The pounding became louder. “Hannah! Please! Just open up and hear me out. I know what happened! I’m not giving up. You should know that!”
He kept at it. Finally, Ben said, “I’ll go.”
“Don’t…don’t hurt him.”
Ben gave her a sad smile before going down the hall. She didn’t listen in but couldn’t miss the muffled voices. Instead of trying to make out what they were saying, she turned up the volume to the movie.
Ben came back a bit later. She didn’t ask what was said and he didn’t offer. She fell asleep next to him and woke to find a note next to her.
Consider forgiving him whether you think he did it or not.
~Ben
She hoped she could.
A Blackpool/Secret Diary of a Call Girl crossover with just a hint of Keen Eddie
Rating: M
Paring: Peter Carlisle/Hannah Baxter
Spoilers: All of Blackpool and S1 of Secret Diary of a Call Girl
Summary: It's a simple arrangement. Right?
Chapter Summary: Hannah's not jealous. Dinner is had. Time is spent apart for various reasons. Hannah makes a surprising discovery.
Previous chapters can be found here.
AN:
swankkat and kalleah made this whole thing better. To see what Hannah wore before, well, you'll see click here.Jealous girlfriend was something Hannah would have never used to describe herself but she found it came quite easily. It wasn’t that another woman was talking with Peter or even that she was flirting. That happened often enough and it didn’t bother her. But there was something about the way this woman acted. A bit too over-familiar with him. And then Hannah discovered who she was and the feeling was even worse.
As she exited the shop, Peter didn’t turn to her until she was almost next to him. “Ah, there you are! Hannah, this is Natalie Holden. Natalie, this…this is my Hannah.” He dropped the bags and casually placed an arm on her shoulder.
Hannah bristled at the name but shook hands with a polite nod and “How do you do?” and then wrapped her free arm around Peter’s waist, staking her claim. She tuned out the conversation, putting all her efforts into being possessive instead.
Natalie dug in her handbag and pulled out a card. “Well, Peter, it was great seeing you. Here’s the number where I’m staying. Call me and we’ll have that dinner. Nice to meet you, Hannah.”
“No, the pleasure was all mine.” She used every bit of her professional charm and was proud of her restraint when Peter’s cheek was air kissed. After there was some distance between them, Hannah turned to Peter. “So, that’s Natalie.”
Peter took her hand. “Yeah. She’s in town on business. Apparently she’s quite an entrepreneur now. Just sort of ran into her.”
“She’s…attractive. If you like that sort of thing.”
“Don’t be jealous.”
“I’m not.”
Peter stopped and turned to her. “Hannah, you don’t have anything to worry about. She’s my past. I got over her a long time ago. You are who I want now. No one else.”
Hannah looked at her feet as she shuffled them. “Then what’s this dinner thing about?”
“Catching up. I didn’t give her specifics because I needed to know when you were free. I’m not going without you. We’re a package deal now.”
She looked up at him with a small smile. “Yeah?”
“Of course. Now, let’s get you home where you can show off all those little things you bought. I’m interested in doing some quality control.”
She grinned as he hailed a cab, feeling better about the situation. She felt even better than that when, after getting through modelling half her new purchases, Peter pounced on her declaring his admiration for the ties that kept the new bra on and the ruffles around the knickers. She’d practically forgotten what was bothering her later on when she was lying satiated in Peter’s arms with him mumbling romantic nothings in her ear.
After multiple reassurances, vocal and otherwise, from Peter, Hannah agreed to the dinner and the time and date was set.
Hannah had a check-up at the doctor’s so Peter was to meet her outside and they would head to the restaurant together. She had just finished up and was heading to the lobby when her mobile went.
“I am so sorry,” he said in lieu of a hello.
“Peter, no. You are not doing this to me.”
“I’ll be there. I promise. It’s just the crime scene I’m coming from caused traffic to back up and I’m sat in a cab quickly going nowhere. Can I please meet you there? I would owe you.”
She huffed a bit. “You’ll be there as soon as you can?”
“Yes. The driver’s inching to a side street as we speak. Thank you, Hannah. I love you.”
“Me too.” She was not happy when she snapped her phone shut. She hailed a taxi of her own and hoped Peter wouldn’t be too long.
Natalie was already waiting when she arrived. “Peter’s stuck in traffic. Do you want to wait or get a table now?”
“Table’s good.” Natalie stood and they approached the hostess.
They slid into their appointed booth and ordered drinks. Hannah found the décor much more interesting than she normally would have. The server took their drink orders and returned with them quickly.
Natalie took a sip of her wine and then said, “So, Hannah, Peter talked about you but didn’t really say anything. He said you were a secretary of some sort?”
“Night time legal secretary, yeah.” She was surprised that Peter kept up that pretence but also didn’t expect him to say what she really did. “We met through my work and knew each other for a few months before we started dating in August. We’ve been serious since the end of November.” She wanted to make it very clear where things stood.
“What made you decide to make the change to dating, if you don’t mind my asking?”
She did but was trying to play nice. “He helped me out of a difficult situation and then, well, he asked me out and I couldn’t think of a why it would be a bad idea.”
“And it’s going well.”
“Very.” Hannah took a drink and thought to herself, ‘So don’t even think of trying anything.’
Natalie studied her for a moment. “Hannah, can I tell you something I think to need to hear?”
She gave Natalie her brightest professional smile. “By all means.”
“No one will ever love you as passionately and completely as Peter Carlisle will. It will consume you both and it can be very destructive if handled wrong. He deserves someone who feels the same way about him. He’s much more fragile than he likes to pretend he is.”
“Is that why you left him?” She couldn’t keep the bitterness from her voice any longer.
Natalie laughed to herself. “No. I was looking for an out from my situation for a long time. I just didn’t know it. Peter was just convenient. I needed some things that were just mine and while I with him, I realised there were many things I never had, including a care-free affair with a charming man that was never meant to last. I’m sorry I hurt him but I think we both ended up where we were meant to. I think we’re both happier now than we ever were together. It’s easy to get caught up in the moment but hindsight and all that. I now I’m in a much better place than I was then and he seems to be as well.”
“I’d like to think I’m a part of that,” Hannah said softly, mostly to herself. She could feel the ice melting in her veins.
“I think you are a big part of that. I mean it. I would ask him about himself and he wouldn’t stop talking about you.” They shared a genuine smile and an understanding.
“I do hope I’m interrupting. Sorry for being late.” Peter had arrived. He slid next to Hannah and kissed her cheek.
“It’s fine. We were just getting to know each other better. Girl talk.” Hannah patted Peter’s leg. He held her hand there before she could pull it back.
The rest of the evening went well. Conversation was no longer strained. While she and Natalie would never be friends, Hannah no longer felt the need to make snide comments under her breath. Any future contact between the two would be an easy acquaintance.
After parting company, Hannah invited Peter back to hers. He accepted and once there, set about doing their nightly routines.
Peter was in his jimjams and under the covers when Hannah entered in a little mint green babydoll with lavender trim and matching panties. He looked up from the book he was reading.
“That’s…new.”
“Yep.” Hannah crawled on the edge of the bed and up between his legs, stopping just out of his reach.
“And lovely.” He took off his glasses and set them and the book off to the side.
“Thought you’d like it.” Peter sat up enough to take her hands in his and gently pulled her closer. He raised an arm and licked the crook of her elbow. Hannah mewed in appreciation. He moved them both so Hannah was propped up on the headboard and he was between her legs. He gave her a cheeky smile.
“However, it’s much too nice to get spoilt. I think at least the knickers need to go.” She lifted her hips to aid in Peter’s decided task. As he came back up, he put her ankles on his shoulders and dipped his head. She let out a cross between a gasp and a moan as she felt his tongue take a broad swipe across her.
She raked her hands through his unruly hair as he did magical things to her with his mouth. She was happy to be in the aftermath when Peter climbed off the bed. He returned moments later, naked and ready to continue what had been started. With her body still humming, he slid into her. It didn’t take long for them both to come, her for the second time. As he nuzzled her neck, Hannah thought back to what Natalie said. She lifted his head so that he was looking at her.
“I do love you so much. You know that right?”
He leaned his cheek against her hand, the ever present stubble scratching her palm and smiled. “Yeah, I know but it’s always good to hear. And I love you, Hannah.” He leaned into her ear. “Completely.” He rolled them so they were facing each other and pulled her to him. And that was how they woke the next morning.
After a bout of fumbling morning sex, Hannah made breakfast as Peter got ready for work. He declared it wouldn’t matter what she served him as long she did it in her short, silky dressing gown. He then pulled her into his lap.
“We’re playful this morning,” she said as she settled in. He just waggled his eyebrows as he sucked on a nipple through the robe. “You’re going to be late,” she meekly protested and then held his head to her.
“Mmph,” he mumbled in response.
“Sod it.” Hannah stood and brought Peter up with her. They made it as far as the three steps to the daybed.
She called a taxi for him as he pulled himself together so he wouldn’t be even later than he was by waiting for the trains.
The next few days the relationship consisted of phone calls and quick meals. Neither schedule allowed for any more than that. After an afternoon and evening of out-calls, Hannah missed Peter and went to his flat instead of her own.
She was disappointed but not surprised to find it empty. She called him to say she was there and got his voice mail. He rang back while she was in the shower and told her to make herself at home if she hadn’t already. She could hear the commotion in the background wherever he was and that he was called away by a female voice.
After slipping into her usual nightwear when she was at his and a pair of her own pyjama shorts, she helped herself to a selection of takeaway boxes she found in the refrigerator. After a couple of flips through the channels, she decided it read in bed, hoping to stay up until Peter came home.
She woke with a start was the book was being pulled from her hands.
“Hey beautiful.” Peter leaned down and kissed her forehead. Hannah gave him a sleepy smile and let her eyes drift shut. The next thing she was aware of was being pulled into Peter’s arms. She wriggled against him with a contented sigh as they both fell asleep.
Hannah woke up to the smell of coffee, a gentle shake of her shoulder and someone calling her name. A few bleary winks revealed Peter offering her a steaming mug. She sat up and took it from him while he pushed a plate of toast in her direction.
“You know, Detective, there are better ways of getting me up in the morning.”
He finished his sip and smiled. “I’m aware and would love to indulge us both I don’t have the time. This case is too important and at a critical point. If I can get away, and I’m not promising I can, are you available for a quick lunch?”
“I think so.” She took a bite of toast. “I miss you. Here I am, a fiercely independent woman who says she doesn’t need anyone but herself and all I want is to be with you. We’ve not even really been separated.”
“I miss you too, Hannah.” He leaned in and kissed her. “I’ll call you about later, either way.” With that he was soon out the door. She had just set the dishes in the sink when she heard the door slam open. Peter strode back in and announced, “Forgot something.” He pulled her to him and kissed her hard. She responded in kind and he let her go. “I love you.”
She grinned at him. “I love you, too. Now go.”
He smiled at her over his shoulder as he closed the door behind him. Hannah couldn’t stop smiling as she got dressed and in a fit of domesticity, made the bed.
She and Ben met for a jog, both happy the weather was taking a turn towards spring. Peter called to say he couldn’t make lunch but hoped she could meet him later at his where he would make dinner for her and give his undivided attention for the rest of the night. She happily accepted.
She had three appointments after that. The first was usual business. The second finished very early and was so mortified that he couldn’t continue. The third rescheduled on her. This left her with unexpected free time and she decided to head to Peter’s a couple hours early. She loved watching him cook. His Jamie Oliver was coming along nicely.
She opened the door to the bedroom and went to strip down for her shower. She had removed her jacket and had a hand on her blouse buttons when it hit her. She didn’t close the door to the bedroom when she left. She turned and saw the bed she knew she had made was now in chaos. She took a deep breath to calm herself. The scent was overwhelmingly familiar. The room smelled of fading sex.
Hannah stumbled across to the bathroom and wretched into the toilet. She stood up, rinsed her mouth and calmly moved to the sofa to wait.
It made sense really when she thought about it. The signs were there. She should know. They had spent very little time together as of late. He was always claiming to be busy. And it when she thought about it, it seemed to her that he made very little effort to see her and that he barely touched her when he did. His job really was the perfect cover. No one would think twice about it. She wouldn’t have had it not been for what she’d just seen.
And that was the thing.
She didn’t have a problem believing a boyfriend would cheat on her. It had happened before, though she usually was the one to stray. She just never thought Peter would be the one to.
The door opened twenty minutes later. She watched as Peter walked into the room, sorting through the stack of mail he was carrying. He set it down and shucked off his coat. He jumped when he saw her.
“Hannah! I didn’t realise you were here already. You were so quiet.” He leaned into kiss her cheek. She let him but didn’t attempt to reciprocate. “You all right, love?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? What reason could there possibly be for me to not be all right?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I’m asking. Hannah, you’re beginning to worry me.” He went to touch her arm. She evaded him by standing and moving down the hall. She stopped at the door to the bedroom and crossed her arms. Peter followed, confused. “What? It’s the bedroom. Where the bed lives, hence the name of the room.”
“And…” She had to admit, he played dumb well.
“What of it?”
“Damn it, Peter! Before I left this morning, I made the bed!”
“And you messed it up when you got here in a clear fit of insanity?”
“No, you bastard.”
“What?”
She saw it hit him. ‘Clever man,’ she thought to herself ruefully.
“Oh, you couldn’t possibly think…”
“How could I not? The evidence is pretty damning. The room still smells like it.” She pushed away from the wall. “I shouldn’t be surprised. But more than anything, I’m disappointed.”
“I didn’t do anything! And even if I did…”
“What? It wouldn’t matter because I sleep with other men for money? You didn’t seem to have a problem with it when it was you.”
Peter ran a hand through his hair and pointed at her. “I have never judged you on your career choice. But since you brought it up, don’t you know it kills me when you step out that door? Makes me sick to know someone else touches you the way I wish only I got to?”
“You said it turned you on. Another lie?”
“It does when I put myself in their place. Let me tell you, my fantasy life is much richer than it was before I met you. And that was long before I truly had you, Hannah.” He started pacing. “I love you so much that I can’t see straight. So I try to be the bigger person. The supportive boyfriend. But you make awfully damn hard sometimes.
“Do you know I live in constant fear? I like Ben but the fact you two are still friends scares the hell out me. What if you decide he really is what you’ve always wanted and that’s why you’ve never cut ties? Or what if one of your clients sweeps you off your feet? Gives you something I can’t? It’s how we met so it’s not out of the realm of possibilities. And I know they may be older or younger that I am. Or better looking. Or more stable. Less angry. Better lovers. They sure as hell are richer. I know the lifestyle you’re accustomed to and I know I can’t give you all of that. And that eats at me constantly. The fact that you take us to the posh places. That you buy me expensive clothes and presents and you think nothing of it. I want to be the man that can do that for you but I know I can’t.”
She could see the tears threatening to fall down his face and felt her own starting to well up. “Then why don’t you say something?”
He looked at her in earnest. “Because it seems to make you happy. And I would do anything to make you happy. I thought I made that clear.”
If the proof wasn’t so clear, she would have forgiven him anything then. She couldn’t look at him when she asked, “Then why did you do it? Do you still have that strong of feelings for Natalie? I’m guessing that’s who it was. Or did you finally give into Shareece?” She was making herself angry again on purpose.
“Hannah, I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING! I have no idea what’s going on here but the fact that you think I could... You don’t know me as well as I thought and I sure as hell don’t know you at all.”
Hannah hugged herself. “I wish I could believe you.”
His voice softened. “Then do.” He went to touch her but it was too much. She knew he lied convincingly enough to Natalie back in Blackpool. Maybe he hadn’t changed as much as he claimed. She grabbed her coat and bag, refusing to meet his eyes.
“I can’t,” she whispered. She paused at the door, finally looking at him. “And for the record, you do know me and you always had me.”
She’d never forget his look of despair as she left.
She flinched as she heard him kick the door as she made her way to the stairs. She really did want to believe him but she just couldn’t.
Hannah hailed a cab once she made it to the street and gave an address. When she reached her destination, she hesitated before knocking.
Ben opened his door and grinned. “Hello!”
She burst into tears and wrapped herself around him. He hugged back. “Hey now, what’s wrong?” She looked up at him and took a breath to answer and ended up sobbing harder. He ushered her to his sofa and held her until she calmed. “Now, you gonna tell me what’s going on?”
“He cheated on me.” She nestled closer.
“Who did?”
“Peter.”
“Pull the other one.” He sat back and gave her an incredulous look. “Peter Carlisle. Your boyfriend. Tall. Skinny. Pale. Always looks like he could use a shave, haircut and a tailor. The one that worships the ground you walk on. That Peter?”
“Yeah.”
“You’re sure?”
“Pretty much.” She gave him a quick run-down of what happened.
“That’s very convincing. Do you really believe it though?”
“I don’t want to be but what other explanation is there?”
“No idea, Han.” He pulled her close again. “Do you want me to kick his arse?”
She laughed. “Not yet. Just be a shoulder to lean on for now.”
“Gladly.”
She let Ben take her for a light dinner and escort her back to her flat. She convinced him to stay and watch some movies. Mostly she wanted the company.
They were into the second one when there was a knock at the door. She knew it was Peter. “Ignore it.” Ben nodded.
The pounding became louder. “Hannah! Please! Just open up and hear me out. I know what happened! I’m not giving up. You should know that!”
He kept at it. Finally, Ben said, “I’ll go.”
“Don’t…don’t hurt him.”
Ben gave her a sad smile before going down the hall. She didn’t listen in but couldn’t miss the muffled voices. Instead of trying to make out what they were saying, she turned up the volume to the movie.
Ben came back a bit later. She didn’t ask what was said and he didn’t offer. She fell asleep next to him and woke to find a note next to her.
Consider forgiving him whether you think he did it or not.
~Ben
She hoped she could.
